Insider's Guide to Mum's formal wear

I was shocked to hear that at some weddings, the bride’s mum’s outfit was not her own choice. In this day and age, is it still possible that women describe to their mothers what to wear? Apparently so, so let's look at a way to breach the subject of the mother of the brides' dress.

Your best policy is to have an open talk with your mother on what you want her to wear and more importantly what she will look fantastic in. At no stage should you force your mum to wear anything she will feel uncomfortable in. Weddings are emotional times for parents and they feel vulnerable. The wrong outfit will simply have her feeling down in the dumps the whole day.

Invite mum for a tea and fit session at a shop where you saw outfits that you want your mum to try on. This obviously means that you did your home work and found two or more stores that not only stock your mother's size, but can come in on the deal to make your mum find the best outfit for herself.

Note: Your groom will score a lifetime of her 'welcome homes' if he offers to pay for this outfit. Whisper this in his ear if his relationship with your mum is not as good as it could be.

Back to your morning with mum; avoid any confrontation before you hit the shops. Some mothers sit and wait for you with a handbag full of well-meant but quite valid objections. Side step all of these by arriving with a massive bunch of flowers when you pick her up. Say thank you for bringing you up to this point and hug her for a little while longer than usual.

Like putty in your hands.

At the shop it is vital to be critical of the outfit and not how mum looks in it. Rather than telling her that she looks old or washed in the colour, blame the designer for not understanding what proud mums want for their daughter’s weddings. When the perfect outfit comes from the dressing room, praise her and make her feel gorgeous in that. Her smiling face will be in your heart forever.

By the end of your day the perfect outfit will be in your shopping bag and both of you will be happy and looking forward to the day. The success of this whole exercise rests firmly on your shoulders, so do your best.

Now to get your mother in law into that pink chiffon number!

Caring For Your Ring

Your wedding ring and engagement rings are two of the most important and significant pieces of jewellery you will ever own. Not only are they a symbol of your love for each other, there's also that gorgeous diamond! So, of course, you'll want to know how to take special care of your rings.
Tips to keep your ring looking fantastic!

    Try not to wear your ring during certain activities that could damage your stone. For example, during sport and exercise - you don't want to have a piece of gym or sports equipment making contact with your ring!
    If you are gardening, take off your wedding ring and put it somewhere safe. It's very likely you could chip your diamond or even knock the setting loose if you're doing heavy yard work.
    When in the kitchen mixing things like pastry or dough with your fingers, take your wedding ring off! These ingredients will leave a layer of film on your ring which will affect the ring's luster.
    During activities such as housework, take your ring off as certain chemicals will spoil it. In particular, chlorine bleach and chlorinated pool water can discolour the mounting on your ring. Gold and silver rings in particular have a high chance of becoming very discoloured over time if continually exposed to the chemicals in swimming pools.
    Remove your ring when applying everyday lotions such as sunscreen and perfume. These can clog up your diamond, and even etch coloured gemstones.
    When you do have your wedding ring off, remember to store it in a safe place. It's the last thing you'll want to misplace. Remember to keep diamonds in a separate place from your other jewellery so as to avoid scratches.
    Most insurance companies will include your ring under your home insurance, but you can always opt to have it insured separately.
    Keep your ring looking good by cleaning it. To do this, simply brush it gently in the front and back of the mounting with a soft brush. Then rinse it a few times in hot water. If you want some extra shine, try soaking your diamond ring in a solution that is 3 parts water and 1 part ammonia. Set the enggagement ring on tissue paper, or gently pat it dry.

Engagement rings: The Trends for 2011

The marriage of William and Kate is going to affect engagement ring trends in much the same way as the wedding of Charles and Diana did in 1981: Wills proposed to Kate using the large solitaire sapphire ring surrounded with diamonds that his mother wore.

Given this influence, as well as a yearning for the values of times gone by, the popularity of vintage rings in 2011 is set to rise. Already the demand for sapphires has increased since the announcement of the royal engagement. These vintage style engagement rings are usually set in gold, although white gold and platinum have gained in popularity. In some cases, in fact, actual vintage rings are being used.
The traditional solitaire will always remain a popular choice, albeit with some variation in cut:  Emerald, Marquise, oval, pear as well as the traditional round cut remains a popular choice.  In addition, these solitaires are also sometimes found surrounded by the added lustre of a surround of small diamonds which can also extend down the band of the ring,
In contrast to the vintage look, a popular modern trend is for that of coloured diamonds, in particular the chocolate and champagne diamonds. An interesting fact about these is that they are mined largely in the Argyle area of Australia. The diamonds, while dark in colour, ranging from bronze to chocolate in shade, are still rated for clarity and colour. (They are not, as is sometimes believed, poor quality white diamonds.) Moving away from diamonds, other popular stones are beryl, ruby and sapphire
Further variations occur in settings comprising a number of stones, which are either set around the central stone, or along the band.  Raised settings showing the central stone to greatest advantage, or twisted bands comprising a single or multiple bands allow the bride to have a ring that is different. A branched band or split shank band encrusted in pave diamonds, leading to the centre stone, can make for a dramatic effect.  Another trend is that of going for geometric and other unusual shapes and angles which are guaranteed to catch the eye.
 In these eco-friendly times brides, who want to avoid the controversy raised by the notion of blood diamonds, can feel free to use conflict-free diamonds in their rings, especially if the gold that is used is recycled.
Ultimately, the choice of engagement rings is as varied as there are brides to wear them. Choice is a personal matter and needs to be determined by the preferences of the bride and groom to be.

Does it have to be a Diamond?

Does it have to be a Diamond?This is a subject which has been the source of much debate and controversy – and there are as many answers as there are men and women planning to get engaged.
Traditional Solitaire Engagement Ring

An important consideration is the symbolism of the engagement ring. It is not merely a gift (albeit a very expensive one) from the man to his bride-to-be; it is a symbol of his love for her and of the lasting nature of their relationship. As such there is great respect for the tradition of the engagement ring which is believed to have had its origin in Roman times, when the left ring finger was believed to be the start of the vena amoris (the vein of love) that led to the heart.

After this time, the history is unclear, but in 1477 Archduke Maximilian of Hamburg may have started the tradition amongst European royalty by giving a diamond betrothal ring to his fiancée, Mary of Burgundy.

It is only in the twentieth century and especially after the 1930’s that the diamond engagement ring really took off. This can be attributed to De Beers who gave some enormous stones to some starlet; ensured that they were well-photographed and began to make sure that movie scripts included the big engagement scenes, complete with wide-eyed joy at the size of the rocks. Then it was ‘life imitating art’ and all brides to be felt that the proposal was incomplete without the addition of a pure white 2 carat diamond!

However, if an engagement is about a promise of fidelity, then who says it has to be visible in the form of a ring; or if there is a ting, why does it have to be a diamond?

In recent times there has been so much controversy surrounding ‘blood diamonds’ (as depicted in the movie of that title, starring Lionardo Di Caprio). Brides and grooms who do not want that on their conscience can happily check out www.brilliantearth,com or www.conflictfreediamons.org  for a diamond that is “produced under ethical conditions” and whose profit “is not used to fund war”.

Controversy aside, the diamond or not debate is once again a matter of personal taste. If your bride to be feels strongly about having a diamond, then your best response is that she must have one. If she has objections, or prefers something else, then once again, you must cater for her taste.
Other stones like pearls (in all their many shades, shapes and sizes), sapphires, rubies, emeralds and garnets have traditionally been used and are being used in more modern settings.

Our Honeymoon Adventure

"When we think of honeymoons we tend to imagine warm, tropical islands surrounded by palm trees and afternoon cocktails on the beach. However, these days some couples are tending to be more adventurous- and Susanne and Tim are no exception. Read on to hear about their amazing honeymoon adventure..."
Our Honeymoon adventures

Since I can remember I've always loved travelling. Growing up I was fascinated by all the countries in the world and as soon as I was old enough, I set out to explore them.

Aged 18 I booked my first trip to Europe and over the following 13 years I jet-setted all over the world, seeing amazing places and meeting wonderful people. I made a bet with one person I met that I would beat them in travelling to 40 different countries first, which stayed in my mind and was one of the first things I blurted out to Tim when we met.

Having moved to London on a work stint aged 31, I met Tim- also a Melburnian living in London- at a bar one night out and he too had travelled all over the world. As he started listing all the places he'd visited we lost count and got to talking about our lives instead.

Although I wasn't looking for a relationship I was immediately attracted to Tim and within days we went on our first date- to Florence! Our feelings were too strong to deny and as we travelled to many more wonderful places- such as Marrakech, Turkey and Malta- after a few months together we decided to move back to Australia at the end of the year to buy a house together.

But first we took advantage of our time left abroad- travelling to many more beautiful places such as Norway, Amsterdam, Scotland and Poland, then decided to travel to Russia on our way home.

On our flight to Russia after hearing an announcement by the air hostess that diamonds must be declared upon arrival, Tim shook me awake and proposed with a beautiful, sparkling diamond ring! We celebrated in Russia, then London, then soon after with our family and friends in Melbourne.

We married on Elwood Beach on January 14, 2007, and when deciding on our honeymoon we both knew we wanted something a little different to what the "traditional" relaxing honeymoon usually entailed. As my life ambition had become to see every one of the world's 195 countries, and Tim's ambition was to see each of the listed ancient and natural wonders of the world, we wanted to work towards our life goals.

So for our honeymoon we decided to book a 10-day trip to backpack through Vietnam and Cambodia, to add to my list of countries, and also decided to visit Ankor Wat- a temple complex in Cambodia- to add to Tim's ancient and natural wonders. Starting in Ho Chi Minh City, we headed to the backpacker strip and booked our overnight boat trip up the Mekong to Cambodia.

Costing only USD$22, it included bus transfers, boat, visas at the Cambodian border, one night's accommodation and two local village tours on the way. Although our accommodation was only 2 stars it was a massive bargain! And not wanting to have a honeymoon that was all about flash hotels it was just what we wanted, a chance to really get to see the cities for what they are.

Then in Phenom Penh, Cambodia, we found a local motel and spent most of the night time in the famous Foreign Correspondence Club (FCC). During the days we toured the killing fields and met the old Cambodian army teams who now make their living allowing travelers to shoot AK47s!

From the capital, we decided to speed things along and fly to Siam Reap- again booking on the backpacker strip- to see Ankor Wat.

Soon back in Vietnam, we really wanted some "beach time" so we did so in fantastic Mui Ne, the Kite-boarding Mecca of Vietnam! There is a fantastic small boutique hotel there with 4-star beachfront cabins for only usd$40 p/n. Great place to unwind and enjoy the beach, relax by the pool and watch the kites and their riders to their thing.

We loved lugging our full backpacks onto a river barge at 4am on our honeymoon - we wouldn't have had it any other way! Recently we took our 10-month-old son, Lucas, on his first trip and visited The UAE, Jordan and Petra. Both our traveling lists continue to grow and we love that we did something meaningful for our honeymoon, something that reflects as both as individuals, and as a couple.

Susanne MacDonald.

"So although backpacking might not be everybody's ideal honeymoon for Susanne and Tim it was the perfect way to celebrate their new lives together. When it comes to choosing your honeymoon destination think about what represents you- the newlyweds!"

Dealing with family stress

Stress is a part of everyone's lives. Stress can be positive or it can be negative. Negative stress causes a lot of problems like anxiety, confusion, and miscommunication. When there is a lot of stress in a family dynamic, it can be particularly difficult for family members to get along in harmony and it can lead to depression among many people. Being in a constant state of stress will start to take its toll on you physically and mentally. Positive stress can make you stronger as it teaches you how to overcome problems and tackle your fears. However, most people experience more negative stress than positive stress. To reduce the family stress in your home, here are some tips that can help:

Tip # 1 - Spend time together
One of the best ways to reduce stress in the home is to get out of the home and spend some quality time together. Make time to get away for a couple hours and participate in fun activities like indoor sky diving, swimming, and miniature golf. If possible, try to take at least one big family vacation per year. This gives you the opportunity to re-connect as a family unit and to get away from the daily stresses you all encounter.
Tip # 2 - Laugh
Turn off the cell phones, i Pods, televisions, and other things that distract you from having a conversation with your family. Sit around the table and eat dinner together and laugh together. Play board games like Twister and reminisce over past experiences you have shared together. Laughter is one of the best ways to reduce stress and to bring a family closer together.
Tip # 3 - Go outside
Far too often we become slaves to television shows, computers, and other things. Instead of spending all your time inside, get outside and experience the world. Take your family hiking and spend time in nature. Try to get everyone in your family to exercise on a daily basis for at least 30 minutes. Exercise also helps to reduce stress and tension and it uplifts everyone's mood. Regular exercise can help you prepare your body to effectively handle stress. Exercise helps you sleep better and it relaxes the muscles, all which help to reduce stress.

Tip # 4 - Meditation and Quiet Time
Stress can come from a variety of different things; one way to reduce it in the home is to have regular quiet time. Set aside 15-30 minutes where everyone will read a book or close their eyes and relax. Meditation can help to improve your life and it can help you handle stress more effectively. Mediation can bring you inner piece and it can draw you closer together as a family unit so you will be able to handle the different situations easier. Mediation also allows you to focus on specific things, which helps you to concentrate on the needs of your family. Pick a book for the entire family to read together. This is a wonderful way to teach your younger children how to read and it allows everyone to get their mind off the stressful activities of the day and focus on a different world. Reading motivational books can also help you handle problems, especially when it comes to making big decisions like a new job or moving.

Tip # 5 - Rest
Make sure everyone in your home is able to get a proper night's rest. Children need 10 hours of sleep or more, adults need about 8-10. Having a proper nights rest will rejuvenate the body and it helps to decrease stress. Getting a good night's rest also enhances your immune system and it helps to reduce the stress hormone in the muscles.

Insider's honeymoon checklist

Before you go on your honeymoon to that tropical island getaway, pay a quick visit to your pharmacy. You will need to shop very carefully to get all the things you will need. Brides that will fly to their honeymoon destination have quite a struggle with airline limitations, so let’s have a look at your shopping list.
A few pointers and ideas:

    You will be restricted when flying to 100ml of any product and in total to one litre of product. This sounds like a lot, but when you combine all that you need to take with you, you will quickly see that you need to leave essentials at home.
    Buy combination products to take with you like shampoo and conditioner in one and body cream with 30+ sun screen already mixed in. This way you save two bottles.
    Most shops have 'ready to fly' product lines especially packed to pass inspection. You can buy these with confidence or simply decant some of your normal product into 100ml clear plastic bottles. That way you know and trust what you have with you.
    Liquid soap and hand cleaners are essential when travelling so find a product that you simply rub on your hands. You will find that you need a few drops, so a 100ml will get you far.
    Make up combination packs are fantastic and if you can do your base, lips and eyes from one compact you are styling. Take with it your best brush and you are set.
    Any chronic medication you may be on must be accompanied by a prescription from your doctor. This include birth control pills. Some countries will not allow certain medicines in and you may be left without it. Also make sure you have at least a thirty day supply with you.
    Pain tablets should be left in their original package. Always bring something for headaches that you know works well as in foreign countries you may end up struggling to find medication.
    Intimate products are essential as well. You may end up with a rash or irritation from a lot of sex and left untreated you will suffer pain and distress. Talk to your pharmacist – they know from experience what you need and will send you off with the best prevention and cure for that nasty honeymoon rash.
    Lubrication is your responsibility as well. To save yourself some space, this is one of those items your groom gets to carry in his bathroom bag. You choose it though before he arrives with some exotic product loaded with perfume.
    Talking about that bathroom bag – for quick inspection at airports, these must be resealable and clear.

Have fun on your honeymoon and relax, you packed everything you know you may need.